My husband gave his mom $30,000 of our savings. I asked for a divorce and revealed a big surprise…

Manners are crucial even among friends, especially regarding money. Make sure you’re thorough, my mother often repeated, regardless of whether something had happened in the past. I never imagined this advice would prove so useful. My name is S. I’m a 30-year-old part-time worker living with my 4-year-old daughter and my husband, Bob, who works in an office.

We rent an apartment not far from Bob’s workplace, and his parents live just two train stops away. Because of this, Bob frequently has dinner at their house. While it may seem considerate, Ba can be careless and selfish. He often drops by his parents’ place after work on a whim, not bothering to let me know even though I’m at home preparing dinner.

I’ve warned him many times, but nothing seems to change. But instead of apologizing, he’d make excuses like, “Mom’s making meatloaf and mashed potatoes tonight.” Thankfully, my father-in-law would call and ask, “Did Bob let you know he’s coming over here?” This helped prevent our dinner from going to waste.

While my father-in-law is considerate, “My mother-in-law can be snideed.” She often remarks, “Bob just prefers my cooking over his wife’s. Whenever he visits, she’d call to gloat, “He just feels more at ease at home, Sally. You need to create a home where your husband wants to stay.” She’d assert her superiority as a woman and a mother, belittling me in the process.

She’d even barge into our apartment unannounced, criticizing, “Bob can’t relax with this kind of cleaning.” “And what’s this in the fridge?” She’d nitpick my housekeeping and rummage through her fridge, never missing a chance to undermine me. She would even throw out my cooking, saying, “How dare you serve such a terrible meal to Bob? Any wife who doesn’t take care of food is the worst.

Everything you make just goes to waste.” When I suggested that I could have eaten it instead of wasting it. She turned red with rage and start yelling, “You’re the one wasting food.” My daughter would start crying in shock and my mother-in-law would quickly leave, not wanting to upset her. She’s selfish and runs away when things get tough.

I told Bob about her bullying, but he just brushed it off, saying, “You’re imagining things.” Or, “She doesn’t mean any harm.” I was initially attracted to his bright and sociable nature, but that feels like a distant memory now. He’s just moody and dismissive, barely acknowledging our daughter when she tries to talk to him.

His standing as a father has hit rock bottom. To make matters worse, the education fund we had been diligently saving for our daughter had completely vanished. A substantial amount, $40,000, had been withdrawn. It had to be Bob, who has access to the family account. When I confronted him about the missing money, he nonulatently replied, “Our daughter doesn’t need the money right now.

We can save up again when it’s necessary.” His cavalier attitude snapped something in me. Don’t joke around. How could you just use the money we saved together like that? It’s not about current need. We saved it because we don’t know when we’ll need it. What did you even spend it on? I helped out, Mom. It’s mostly my earnings anyway. Got a problem with that.

I contributed, too. I saved from our budget cuts. I worked hard to manage that money. Your contributions are just pocket change. He sneered. Our shouting match escalated. Yet miraculously, our daughter remained asleep. “That’s it. We’re getting a divorce. I knew you were careless, but taking our child’s savings without saying anything is unforgivable.” “Go ahead.

You can’t survive on a part-time salary,” he retorted smuggly. His words left me momentarily speechless. “Satisfied with having silenced me,” he added. I’m always ready for a divorce before retreating to his room. Though my fists clenched in frustration, I knew I wasn’t going to just cry myself to sleep. Determined, I started preparing for the divorce.

I heard my wife talking on the phone with Bob this morning. My father-in-law messaged me the following Friday. It seemed my mother-in-law had invited my husband over for a special dinner that night. Since Bob hadn’t mentioned anything, he was probably planning to go without telling me as usual. Ever since I declared my intention to divorce and was belittled for my part-time job, Bob’s attitude has shifted to one of outright disdain.

He’d say things like, “I don’t need to care for a dependent like you.” While scattering the laundry around and neglecting to clean the room, his nicking, “You call this cleaning?” Echo his mother’s criticism. Seeing the call from my father-in-law as the perfect opportunity, I decided it was time to put my plan into action.

I timed my visit to my in-laws house to coincide with Bob’s return from work. It appeared my father-in-law hadn’t arrived home yet. Bob and my mother-in-law were clearly taken back to see me, but she quickly scoffed. Oh, you came to mooch off the sushi dinner. “How despicable! You don’t deserve it,” she spat venomously.

It was clear they had no intention of letting me inside. Despite the wooden front door of their detached house not being very soundproof, their loud voices carried outside. As always, they were oblivious to the impact of their selfishness on those around them. I haven’t received any message about dinner.

All your father told me was that you were visiting your parents’ house. I said, “Are you being sarcastic because I didn’t inform you? Do I need to report every move to a mere housemate talking to my dad behind my back as a wife? That’s just creepy.” He retorted. He seemed absorbed in his own harsh words while my mother-in-law smirked in the background.

I shot back, “The creepy one is you,” which wiped the smirk off her face. “What did you say?” she demanded. “It’s disgusting how you misinterpret your father’s kindness. You’re a lousy husband who can’t communicate. Can’t you see he’s just trying to be considerate?” Bob seemed to realize his lack of communication was part of the problem.

My husband bit his lip and fell silent. Then you should have declined. You’re causing trouble for dad and being so brazen. My mother-in-law defended him. Her words as hollow as ever. Please keep barking over there. I didn’t come here to argue with you. Let’s get straight to the point. I want a divorce.

What? Are you serious? Bot’s eyes widened in genuine shock. You think you can manage on a part-time salary? And by the way, I’m not giving you our granddaughter. You can’t raise her. Though apologize to mom. I addressed the shouting pair calmly. Starting next month, I’ll be working full-time. I’m currently part-time in medical administration, the same place where I worked full-time before we got married.

When I mentioned my thoughts about divorce to my colleagues, they suggested that I return to full-time work. The kindergarten my daughter attends is conveniently close to my workplace, allowing me to pick her up during my breaks, and she can stay at the workplace daycare until the end of my shift.

They advise, “There’s no way you can raise her on your own,” my mother-in-law added. anticipating you’d say that I’ve already arranged to live with my parents. They’re taking care of my daughter today. Unlike a certain husband who just dismisses his daughter, they shower her with love and attention. What? My mother-in-law turned to Bob, who awkwardly looked away.

Don’t joke around. This is unacceptable. Her trembling voice revealed her agitation. A father who secretly uses the education fund is nothing but harmful, I declared firmly. At that moment, the front door opened and my father-in-law stepped in saying, “Sorry for interrupting. Could I hear more about this?” It seemed he had been listening from the entrance.

“You use the education fund. What do you mean, Bob? It’s not like that.” Mom asked me to help with renovation costs, so I supported her. Renovation costs. My father-in-law looked just as confused and turned to my mother-in-law for a detailed explanation. Bob suggested we move in together. It would be more economical than continuing to pay rent.

And if we’re going to live together, renovations are necessary, right? That’s where the money went. I felt overwhelmed by the new revelations. Moving in together, I haven’t heard a word about that. And what about the education fund? Sally, could you explain? I detailed to my father-in-law how Bob had withdrawn the money and informed him that we were getting a divorce.

Then you should just leave. Leave the granddaughter here. I’ll take care of her. my mother-in-law insisted, her voice trembling. No, this was a decision made by my husband. I can’t break a promise made between spouses. Ha, I don’t recall agreeing to that, I thought to myself as I pulled out a file from my bag and showed it to them.

This is the pledge we made regarding the education fund. Given Bob’s carelessness, I documented our agreement just in case. One of my mother’s lessons was always to document anything related to money. Bob’s signature is here, my father-in-law observed, sounding impressed. What? Why is this here? Bob’s face turned pale, realizing he likely signed without reading.

The agreement clearly stated that if the education funds were used for anything other than their intended purpose, it would result in an immediate divorce. Custody of any children involved would go to the other parent, and if he failed to comply, he would have to repay twice the amount withdrawn, granting me the right to file for divorce mediation.

That’s the gist of it. In this case, Bob would lose custody, and if he couldn’t comply, he would owe me $80,000, giving me grounds to pursue divorce mediation. If you listen to your mother, this will turn into a dispute with a $80,000 payout. I’ve gathered ample evidence of your behavior and your mother’s treatment of me, so you can imagine who would get custody in mediation.

I gave a small, satisfied smile, and my husband let out a startled gas. Well, my father-in-law said, clearly taken aback. For now, return the money Bob gave you. You haven’t started the renovations yet, right? The money should still be there. Upon hearing this, my husband’s face lit up with hope.

He might have thought that recovering the education fund could make the divorce unlikely. But when my mother-in-law saw his expected look, she turned pale and shook her head. “It’s gone. I’ve already spent it,” she admitted weakly, causing everyone to gasp in shock. What? My mother-in-law trembled and fell silent. There was a bag I wanted and some clothes, too.

I only intended to borrow them, but I couldn’t resist, she confessed. I was left speechless with disbelief, but my father-in-law reacted quickly. This is absurd. What were you thinking? But, but Bob said we could save up again for the granddaughter’s education fund. So, I thought it would be okay, she protested.

What? You knew it was meant for her daughter’s education and still spent it. How can you even claim you won’t hand over the granddaughter who’s truly despicable here? You and Bob are nothing but harmful. An awful combination of parent and child, I said, my anger reaching its peak, my voice colder than I intended.

My mother-in-law could only stare in shock. I’m sorry, but I no longer want to be part of this family. I agree. They’re nothing but poison to our precious granddaughter. My mother-in-law broke down in tears at his words. After that, I finalized the divorce with Bob. Thanks to the evidence of mistreatment and the pledge, the child support and property division went as I had hoped.

The education fund, of which a third was from my salary, along with the alimony, total $50,000, which I received. My ex-husband struggled to come up with the money. My mother-in-law had to sell all the designer goods and jewelry she had bought with the remaining amount covered by my father-in-law.

Isn’t it a husband’s job to support his wife? Bob and his mother blamed my father-in-law, but he was furious and severed all ties with both of them. My ex-husband reached out to my mother-in-law about moving in together after he botched a project at work and was demoted with a reduced salary.

They could no longer afford their apartment rent and had to downsize to a small place. To raise the necessary funds, they had to cancel their life insurance policies. By combining the payoffs from each policy, they managed to scrape together the repayment amount. When he reported that the payment was complete and shared his struggles, I merely responded with an indifferent, “Oh,” and let it go.

Frustrated, he shouted over the phone. “Do you have any words of gratitude?” “No, I don’t. I have grievances of my own. Why not add that to the bill and charge you?” I suggested and he fell silent. I then hung that, then changed my contact information. That was the last time he reached out to me. Apparently, my mother-in-law later approached my father-in-law seeking reconciliation.

He clearly refused and from what he heard, their situation was dire. Their spending habits remained unchanged, leaving their finances in chaos. “Now,” the once closed parent child duo spent their days arguing, blaming each other for their troubles. “He’s your beloved son, isn’t he?” my father-in-law said with a hint of sarcasm.

My mother-in-law replied, “He’s nothing but a frustrating money pit. Whether it involves parents and children or spouses, it’s crucial to be clear about financial matters.” Thanks to my mother’s teachings, I felt reassured that I had made the right decision.