During a recent appearance, Vice President Kamala Harris gave an eye-opening explanation of crime. She used a metaphor about the stars that left the audience wondering: Was Kamala trying to be profound, or had she simply been staring at the sky too long?

“You know, I was talking to someone once who said, if you look at the positions of the stars in the sky, don’t just take them for granted…” Kamala begins, as if she’s about to share a revolutionary discovery that could change the way we understand the universe. Instead, we’re treated to a metaphor so basic it makes you wonder if Kamala has ever looked up at the night sky.

Her reasoning? The stars, when viewed individually, seem random, but when grouped together, they form constellations. Oh my gosh, Kamala, you really opened our eyes. But that’s not new information, unless you’ve never looked up at the sky.

Greg and Kat Join in Mocking Kamala

Greg Gutfeld, in his trademark comedic style, wasted no time in “mocking” Kamala’s star metaphor. He immediately said, “I looked up at the sky last night and took a picture of a really interesting constellation… of absolute absurdity.” The audience couldn’t help but laugh, and it was clear that Kamala’s high-minded explanation had completely failed.

Kat Timpf couldn’t help but be funny either, saying: “I don’t know if she’s trying because she knows she’s going to lose, or not trying because she thinks she’s going to win anyway.” She continued: “Is this Kamala after a few drinks, or has she had some ‘space cake’?”

Greg jumped in and likened Kamala to family: “She’s like that relative you see on Thanksgiving—no job, no connections, but she loves to give life advice. And we just sit there and think, ‘Yeah, yeah, go ahead, honey.’”

The Plagiarism Story Gets Even More Complicated

But wait, it’s not just about the stars! Kamala Harris is also in trouble for plagiarism allegations in her book. Greg quips, “Biden is the only person whose memoir was written by someone else—didn’t you know? It’s not his story, it’s ‘his people’ writing it for him.”

Kat joins in on the joke: “The plagiarism thing is so classic! It’s like writing your own memoir and saying, ‘Oh, I didn’t write that part—my ghostwriter did.’”

Kamala Over Joe Rogan?

The big question: Should Kamala sit across from Joe Rogan? Greg and Kat both agree on one thing: It would be a crash course we don’t want to miss. Kat is quick to warn, “Don’t go up to Joe Rogan, Kamala. He’ll ask you the follow-up questions you’re trying to avoid.”

Imagine the scene: “What do you mean ‘star,’ Kamala?” “Can you say that again but with a little more clarity?” “What did you just say… bull or horse?” It’s hard to imagine Kamala answering those questions, especially with Rogan’s uncompromising style.

Conclusion of the Universe

Ultimately, Kamala Harris’s star metaphor was not just a moment of confusion, but also emblematic of her entire political career. A series of missteps, confusing metaphors, and confusing statements that left us scratching our heads. The only thing that was clear was that Greg and Kat had a blast making fun of Kamala’s performance, turning it into its own cosmic comedy show.

So Kamala, if you’re listening to this, maybe it’s time for you to step away from the stars and get back to real-world issues on Earth. Or at least learn to connect the dots without making us dizzy with confusion.

PS Kamala, in our next interview, could you try talking about topics that don’t require follow-up questions—or maybe even complete sentences? Because when it comes to your latest metaphor, even Greg and Kat are wondering if we’re being sucked into a black hole of incomprehensible confusion.